If the Emperor Had a Text to Speech Device
TV Show • Comedy
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Is there eye mutilation?
85 supporters
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Anonymous
The Emperor wants to know what happened to his left eye. Rogal tells him that it was poked out by his Iron Halo by accident.
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Are there incestuous relationships?
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78 supporters
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Does someone die by suicide?
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255)
76 supporters
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Is there domestic violence?
National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-7233)
72 supporters
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Does someone attempt suicide?
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68 supporters
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Anonymous
Rogal Dorn is seen consulting the Pain Gauntlet at several points, to the point that his hand falls off.
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Is there sexual content?
53 supporters
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Anonymous
The Custodes (minus Kitten) are all flamboyant, scantily-clad homosexual men, with supersoldier phisique on full display.
A man looking at naughty pictures triggers a chain-reaction of executions, culminating with the planet being nuked into space dust.
The 'Gilbert Gottfreid reads Erotica' sketch is parodied.
The Emperor reminisces about his... exploits... at one point.
A man looking at naughty pictures triggers a chain-reaction of executions, culminating with the planet being nuked into space dust.
The 'Gilbert Gottfreid reads Erotica' sketch is parodied.
The Emperor reminisces about his... exploits... at one point.
1 comment | Add comment
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Is there finger/toe mutilation?
45 supporters
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Anonymous
Rogal Dorn's hand falls off from using the Pain Gauntlet for every little decicion.
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Does a kid die?
38 supporters
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Anonymous
A group of children is run down by a motorcycle.
A Plaguebearer, whom Epidemus loves like a son, is shot.
A Plaguebearer, whom Epidemus loves like a son, is shot.
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Is someone burned alive?
35 supporters
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Anonymous
A squadron of soldiers and one knight are accidentally teleported into a sun. This is predictably very painful and traumatic for all involved.
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Are there n-words?
27 supporters
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Anonymous
The Emperor is, in fact, incensed at the implication that racism might exist at all.
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Does someone say "I'll kill myself"?
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255)
27 supporters
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Are there bugs?
25 supporters
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Anonymous
Demonic flies near Nurgle-worshippers.
Insectoid aliens called Tyranids make cameos.
Insectoid aliens called Tyranids make cameos.
1 comment | Add comment
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Is there hate speech?
24 supporters
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Anonymous
This is Warhammer 40,000, where religeous intolerance and xenophobia is a survival mechanism rather than just being a jerk.
The Emperor has some choice words to say about religeon in general.
The Emperor states that girls are yucky at one point.
The Emperor is deeply upset that nearly all of his Custodes (royal guards) came out as flamboyant homosexuals in his absence.
Magnus hates his brother Leman Russ, who is a wolf-kin.
Skarbrand hates literally everything in the whole universe and lets everyone within earshot know about it.
The Emperor has some choice words to say about religeon in general.
The Emperor states that girls are yucky at one point.
The Emperor is deeply upset that nearly all of his Custodes (royal guards) came out as flamboyant homosexuals in his absence.
Magnus hates his brother Leman Russ, who is a wolf-kin.
Skarbrand hates literally everything in the whole universe and lets everyone within earshot know about it.
1 comment | Add comment
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Is someone hit by a car?
22 supporters
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Anonymous
A group of children is run down by a motorcycle.
Tanks run people over.
Tanks run people over.
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Does someone break a bone?
21 supporters
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Anonymous
Dominique's neck breaks when his corpse is possessed.
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Does a non-human character die?
21 supporters
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Anonymous
Yeah, lots, but they were all bad.
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Does a woman get slapped?
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16 supporters
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Are there clowns?
11 supporters
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Anonymous
Cegorach The Laughing God and his acolytes, the Harlequins are encountered.
1 comment | Add comment
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Is someone possessed?
11 supporters
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Fyodor is indwelled by the Star Child.
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Does someone have a chronic illness?
10 supporters
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Anonymous
Nurgle worshippers, what with Nurgle being the Chaos god of Diseases and all...
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Is a priceless artifact destroyed?
4 supporters
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Anonymous
The Emperor is upset at his namesake space battleships (irreplaceable because of Lost Technology utilized in their construction) being destroyed in kamikaze attacks.
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Is there a nuclear explosion?
1 supporters
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Anonymous
An Exterminatus (basically, nuking a planet until it stops being a planet any more) is shown.
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Does the abused become the abuser?
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